June 21, 2020
Morning Service

Happy Father’s Day!  Today though fathers I am going to ask you to share the spotlight.  The title of the message declares my intent today; to make this family day.  Since we have the kids in here with us today, I want to include them as well and discuss how it is God designed the family to operate.  As Christians, or Jesus followers as I like to say, we have been given a treasure map to happiness and contentment.  When we have questions on how things are supposed to work, we are so blessed to have been given our Bible, which is the very Words of God, to show us the truth; the path to happiness.  God uses it to explain to us how we are to do things that not only please Him, but to find contentment in living how God designed us to live.  It gives us a foundation to build upon that does not move with what our culture or society thinks.  It has been the same since the beginning of time.  God created this world and He has explained to us how it is to operate in our Bibles.  It is our instructions on how to do life the right way.  Our job is to first ask the question, seek the answer in God’s Word, and finally be obedient to what we find.  So here we go:

“What is a family supposed to look like according to God’s Word?”

            Families come in all shapes and sizes, but what we are looking for is how God designed the family to look like.  It all begins just like from the time of creation with a man and a woman.  God had already created Adam and he was busy naming all the other animals, but God noticed he needed something else; a helper or companion that was like him.  Let’s pick up there and read what God says about the creation of a woman.

Gen 2:20-24 So Adam gave names to all cattle, to the birds of the air, and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper comparable to him.  (21)  And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place.  (22)  Then the rib which the LORD God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man.  (23)  And Adam said: "This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man."  (24)  Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.

            God designed the family to begin with a man and a woman falling in love and deciding to be married; to commit to each other for the rest of their lives becoming “one flesh.”  They then leave their parents and start a new life of their own.  This is the beginning of the family unit as we God has designed it.  Now let’s look at how these two are to get along.  Turn to Ephesians 5 where Paul explains to us the roles and responsibilities of the wife first and then the husband and he even discusses the children.

 

Eph. 5:22-24Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.  (23)  For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body.  (24)  Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything.

            God has designed the wife to be under subjection to the husband.  Someone has to be in charge and as Adam was created first, God has placed him in charge.  This is in no way lessens the importance of a woman, but it simply defines her role.  She is still able to help with decisions and take charge of the household, but she is always to be under the authority of her husband.  There will be problems if the man does not take the authority given to him and use it, or if the wife decides on her own that she will be in charge and chooses to ignore the role God has given her. Paul gives the example to help us understand the seriousness of these roles by using how the church is under the authority of Christ.  He is leading and we are to be faithfully following Him and the same is to be true with the family.  He now references another example of Christ and the church as he discusses the husband’s role.

 

Eph. 5:25-29 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, (26) that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, (27) that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish.  (28)  So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself.  (29)  For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church.

            When you think of the husband being the boss of the house, you may think that is a great job to be able tell everyone what to do but look closer.  A husband and father is to love his wife and family like Christ loved the church.  Jesus loved the church enough to sacrifice His own life for her.  Being in charge means also giving up of yourself for the good of the whole family.  He is to love them more than he loves himself.  If they are hungry, he will provide food.  If they need clothes, he will provide them.  The needs of the family come before his own needs and wants.  He will take care of them as he does himself because that is God’s plan.  The man is the one God will hold responsible when things don’t go according to His plan.  It was Adam God called out to in the Garden when they had eaten the forbidden fruit, not Eve.  He must learn to lead his family just as God designed him to do.  Where can he learn how to do that?  His Bible!  The man is in charge and the woman is to be his helper and together they are to raise the children.  Okay kids now it is your turn to see what God expects of you.

 

Eph. 6:1-3 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.  (2)  "HONOR YOUR FATHER AND MOTHER," which is the first commandment with promise: (3) "THAT IT MAY BE WELL WITH YOU AND YOU MAY LIVE LONG ON THE EARTH."

            Children, you are to obey your parents and honor them both.  You do that by showing them respect; listening when they speak, and doing what they ask you to do.  Disrespect, or not honoring, would be to ignore your parents and just go ahead and do what you want to do.  God has placed them in charge over you and He commands you to obey and honor them; that is your job.  When you disrespect your parents you are disrespecting God.  It is their job to teach you the right way to do things.  The fact that you are here today tells you that they believe it is important to seek out the things of God.  How does God command parents to raise their children in the home He designed?  Where can we find that answer?  In the Bible!

 

Eph. 6:4 And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.

            Parents are not to treat you as slaves or servants, but they are to “train them to follow Jesus.”  This is their #1 job on this earth, to teach you the story of Jesus and explain to you how much He loves you!  They are to introduce you to the Creator of the world and the One who wants to be your Savior and closest friend.  They are also commanded to teach you about the things of life so when you get older and want to start a family you will know what to do; showing you how God designed a family to operate.  Look at what Solomon wrote:

 

Pro 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.

 

Pro 22:15 Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child; The rod of correction will drive it far from him.

 

Pro 29:15 The rod and rebuke give wisdom, but a child left to himself brings shame to his mother.

 

Pro 13:24 He who spares his rod hates his son, but he who loves him disciplines him promptly.

            It is the parents job to teach you to act and live like God wants you to.  Discipline is one way they are commanded to do that.  To discipline you means they punish you for doing wrong and reward you for doing right.  They don’t do this to be mean to you, but because they love you!  This is their job given to them from God.  They are told to lead you to doing things that please God, so when you grow up you will know right from wrong and make good choices in your life and lead your family to do the same.  The other way they teach you is to live in the way God designed them to live and act it out.  Parents you are to be an example to your children on how you are to act.  When we follow God’s plan it leads to happiness and when we choose our own way it leads to troubles.

            I believe many of the problems we are having in our society today have evolved from the erosion of family unit.  Dads are not present.  Moms are forced to fill roles that they are not designed for.  If they are there, they don’t take a proactive approach to parenting and let the kids do whatever they want.  Discipline has been withheld and respect for authority has not been instilled in children who are now adults.  I challenge each family unit here today to sit down and discuss the design God has laid out for you and evaluate yourselves and be sure you are doing your best to line up with it.

 

Heavenly Father bless Your Word and give us the courage and desire to line up with it.